Galatians 5:22-23
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law."
I have this quote taped to my monitor. I'm trying to memorize it. I usually don't have a hard time memorizing verses, but this one eludes me. I spent so long - from about puberty until about a year ago - cultivating rotten "fruit". My fruit was anger, rage, deceit, hate, drunkenness, promiscuity, self-indulgence, and envy. I would masquerade as this sweet, intelligent, caring individual - and when you got close, the sheep's clothing would come off. I no longer wonder why my daughter struggles with life. She learned how to live from me. And I was not a good teacher.
I refuse to dwell on that. I have so much more to offer now. I actually enjoy being a mother now, something that I could not always say. I love to spend time in my daughter's room, like last night, listening to her music and rolling on the floor with her, laughing. And she enjoys it, too. Her smile is proof. I love to see my daughter smile. And I'm starting to see her care - about others, that is. We're still working on her caring about her "things".
Sidebar: I decided yesterday that it's a parent's job to make their child's life miserable and the child's job to send their parent to an early grave.
So back to her caring about her things. I swear, if I have to pick up another dropped towel or turn off another bedroom light.*
We spent almost two hours at the pool yesterday. And for lunch the kids sat out on the porch while I gathered and served the traditional pb&j, 1/2 an orange, and cheetohs on paper plates with kool-aid. It was extra special because I NEVER buy kool-aid or cheetohs. Except for this time. And really, I only bought the cheetohs. The kool-aid came with my bag of splenda. And no, I'm not going to capitalize any of these proper nouns because this is my site and I don't feel like it. And I don't know if I spelled "cheetohs" correctly, but I don't care because I won't need that word in the future EVER. I'll NEVER buy them again. EVER. (Except maybe for special occassions or as a treat...)
*As you become the mother of older children, you learn to not complete your threats lest you be forced to follow through.
I have this quote taped to my monitor. I'm trying to memorize it. I usually don't have a hard time memorizing verses, but this one eludes me. I spent so long - from about puberty until about a year ago - cultivating rotten "fruit". My fruit was anger, rage, deceit, hate, drunkenness, promiscuity, self-indulgence, and envy. I would masquerade as this sweet, intelligent, caring individual - and when you got close, the sheep's clothing would come off. I no longer wonder why my daughter struggles with life. She learned how to live from me. And I was not a good teacher.
I refuse to dwell on that. I have so much more to offer now. I actually enjoy being a mother now, something that I could not always say. I love to spend time in my daughter's room, like last night, listening to her music and rolling on the floor with her, laughing. And she enjoys it, too. Her smile is proof. I love to see my daughter smile. And I'm starting to see her care - about others, that is. We're still working on her caring about her "things".
Sidebar: I decided yesterday that it's a parent's job to make their child's life miserable and the child's job to send their parent to an early grave.
So back to her caring about her things. I swear, if I have to pick up another dropped towel or turn off another bedroom light.*
We spent almost two hours at the pool yesterday. And for lunch the kids sat out on the porch while I gathered and served the traditional pb&j, 1/2 an orange, and cheetohs on paper plates with kool-aid. It was extra special because I NEVER buy kool-aid or cheetohs. Except for this time. And really, I only bought the cheetohs. The kool-aid came with my bag of splenda. And no, I'm not going to capitalize any of these proper nouns because this is my site and I don't feel like it. And I don't know if I spelled "cheetohs" correctly, but I don't care because I won't need that word in the future EVER. I'll NEVER buy them again. EVER. (Except maybe for special occassions or as a treat...)
*As you become the mother of older children, you learn to not complete your threats lest you be forced to follow through.
posted by Heather at 8:55 AM
<< Home